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Unlimited Everything

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Hey, i would like the following:

1. PHP
2. Apache
3. Root access
4. SSH
5. Unlimited MySQL
6. Unlimited pop3
7. Unlimited bandwith
8. Unlimited space
9. Unlimited help
10. Good service
11. 99.99 % uptime
12. Not a joke host that will disappear
13. Nice admin
14. All scripting languages
15. My own apache mods i want
16. Domain hosting
17. Sub-Domains
18. DNS servers
19. Unlimited addon accounts
20. No TOS
21. Real Media
22. Shoutcast
23. Dedicated GigBitE
24. Cpanel/plesk/ensim
25. Unlimited file size.








Disclaimer: This post was made as an utter joke.
 
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Host yourself. You can add any component you wish... and it's always blazing fast (assuming you have decent hardware of course).
 
1. PHP
2. Apache
3. Root access
4. SSH
5. Unlimited MySQL
6. Unlimited pop3
7. Unlimited bandwith
8. Unlimited space
9. Unlimited help
10. Good service
11. 99.99 % uptime
12. Not a joke host that will disappear
13. Nice admin
14. All scripting languages
15. My own apache mods i want
16. Domain hosting
17. Sub-Domains
18. DNS servers
19. Unlimited addon accounts
Click to expand...

I'm guessing this is a joke...lol...noone offers unlimited space or unlimited bandwidth. NOONE.
 
If you find such a host please let me know :p

besides I also need C-Panel, some stats software, hotlinking enabled, supporting streaming audio, all file types allowed and a myname.host.com subdomain


because I want to set up a phpBB forum for my personal homepage ;)
 
Yeah dude, you forgot CPanel w/hotlinking enabled and no TOS so I can put whatever I want on! And you forgot it has to be on a dedicated OC-3 line for the server you're on only. Heck, since you have root access, why not just take over? :p
 
Let me rephrase what I said then.

Noone offers unlimited bandwidth and space and survives over a year on the market. I know this for a fact...well..of course, unless its some filthy rich person who can splash out thousands of pounds at a time to buy servers with enough RAM, Hard Drive space and Country Back-Bone connections all to help out lots of people for free.
 
Originally posted by GamingSource
Let me rephrase what I said then.

Noone offers unlimited bandwidth and space and survives over a year on the market. I know this for a fact...well..of course, unless its some filthy rich person who can splash out thousands of pounds at a time to buy servers with enough RAM, Hard Drive space and Country Back-Bone connections all to help out lots of people for free.
Click to expand...

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL

Read my disclaimer. I have gotten my joke out of this, noone these days read anything. !!! :biggrin2: :biggrin2: :biggrin2: :biggrin2: :D
 
Originally posted by GamingSource
Maybe because you posted the disclaimer after I had posted my rant? :D
Click to expand...

Nope, that disclaimer has been there. I added some features i wanted ;). Sorry, but you dont read. So i would like to let you know that signing a contract could be hazordous to your health since it has the small text as well.
 
The point was for me and my friends to have a good laugh, and see if people even read the small text these days.

If you dont see the joke in it, then go away and get some sense of humor.
 
Originally posted by X-Istence

Hey, i would like the following:

1. PHP
2. Apache
3. Root access
4. SSH
5. Unlimited MySQL
6. Unlimited pop3
7. Unlimited bandwith
8. Unlimited space
9. Unlimited help
10. Good service
11. 99.99 % uptime
12. Not a joke host that will disappear
13. Nice admin
14. All scripting languages
15. My own apache mods i want
16. Domain hosting
17. Sub-Domains
18. DNS servers
19. Unlimited addon accounts
20. No TOS
21. Real Media
22. Shoutcast
23. Dedicated GigBitE
24. Cpanel/plesk/ensim
25. Unlimited file size.
Click to expand...


26. FREE Domain

:smile2:
 
Last edited:
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